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Simply The Best Schitt’s Creek Season 6 Quotes

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Since discovering this series last summer (I know, I know- ugh, so American of me!) I have been obsessed with it. Ob.Sessed. And that needs to be celebrated. Here are simply the best Schitt’s Creek Season 6 Quotes. Spoilers if you haven’t seen the show just yet! 

The best schitts creek season 6 Quotes

I love this show, I love this family, I love these actors. 

And my goodness, I love the quotes from this show! 

If you haven’t caught up on Schitt’s Creek, please, I beg you, run to Pop TV App or Netflix and start watching. You might have to work hard to get through Season 1 as the characters are super unlikeable- but trust me- that totally changes. 

And you will fall in love!

Schitt’s Creek Season 6 kicked off – and it is the final season of the show. 

SADNESS all around. But we’re going to make sure some of the best Schitt’s Creek Season 6 quotes live on forever. 


schitts creek season 6 on Netflix

Simply The Best Schitt’s Creek Season 6 Quotes

Episode 1

This is like watching a car crash. -Stevie

This is not a winner, Clive! – David

And for that I am apologetic… – David

My bebes- my girls, my girls! Lorna, second from the left! If she takes on smoke she’ll never recover! And Cindy- below her. Cindy! I just gave her a blowout! – Moira

Do we go back and talk to Clive? – David

It’s like a thousand babies teething! – David

Sounds like you boys dodged a bacon-wrapped bullet. – Moira

If you’re happy, I’m happy.” – Patrick

I fit my highschool best friend in a suitcase way smaller than this when crossing the border between Laos and Vietnam, so I’m pretty sure I can figure this out. – Alexis

I’ve been gifted a smoke signal, and you will never again find me back in the closet. – Moira

Coming, Moira! Don’t make any sudden moves. – Johnny

You invited MOM? She’s literally been asleep in a closet for a week. – Alexis

David- I’ve asked you not to indulge in that smokey cologne, it’s enough to give someone a seizure! – Moira

My legs are in slumber- carry me! – Moira

Moira, you know if Johnny locked you in that closet, we’re going to have to call the police.” – Roland

best schitts creek quotes

Schitt’s Creek Season 6 Episode 2 Quotes

I will take a shower, but we must never see each other again. – David

How was your 7th shower? -Patrick

Purely coincidental! – Patrick

More expensive than my dignity? -David
Comparable at least– Patrick

You described Social Media as an amusement park for narcissists. – Alexis

Alexis- I do believe we need to purchase antibiotics. We’ve just gone viral! – Moira

Love you! – Patrick
At least one of us does! – David

Why do I get the feeling this isn’t an open house?– Roland
Because of the coffin. – Stevie

Frans doesn’t sound nice– David

And his #fiance Patrick!– Moira

Since I wasn’t in the curling league, can I go HOME?– Stevie

Nighttime oopsie daisy.– Moira

I’m oddly flattered. – Patrick

So keep David off the internet for 24 hours or until a celebrity says something wrong- which could be any minute. -Alexis

I don’t think I’m ready to commit to this business like- as a whole. -Stevie

There’s literally no liquid left in my body, soo… – David

Schitt’s Creek Season 6 Episode 3 Quotes

We discovered a new breed of fly that mates with itself. – Ted
YUMMM– Alexis

I do have to tur-tell you that I’ve been thinking about you, a lot… – Ted

Alexis, what have I told you about putting your body on the internet? Never! Never without proper lighting! – Moira

LarryAir sounds like a Dollar Store perfume! – David

Alexis! Turtles do not pets make. – Moira

You may as well tie a leash around a chicken cutlet! – Moira

You dress for the job you want. – David
So you want to be a youth pastor? – Stevie

Look at you, Robert, with the hides of a herd of Holstein on your back! -Moira

Finger snaps for David! – Carol from LarryAir


Admit it- I’m more qualified than you. – Stevie

My little Galapaguy… – Alexis

Schitt’s Creek Season 6 Episode 4 Quotes

A siren call to the cinemtic rapture that is to come! – Moira

Its practically obsidian in here- Moira

You manifested your wedding and I’m like literally stunned- but like in a good way.. -Alexis

I don’t know how to take that. – David

You didn’t marrry JC Chaze or Jenna Elfman, but I feel like Patrick is kinda the best of both of them. -Alexis

Where are my favorite groom and David up to? – Alexis

re: that… you weren’t supposed to be here for 6 months, so I might have asked someone else. – David

Imagine what I could do with your batchelor party, David. Diplo still sends me nudes… – Alexis

Maybe Benny and Betty left this here and we just inherited a bag of money and a gun! – Roland

That stuff could have been here for years
Explain why its still hot?
Its called Global Warming, Johnny. Why do you strike me as one of those people who doesn’t believe in that.

Stunning, isn’t it? What a human beak can do! – Moira

Well- it looks like a REAL movie. – Jocyln

Were the crows nice? My uncle had a pair that kept trying to get me to take my bra off. – Twyla

You do know that PanAm was cancelled after a season, right? – David

So how safe can the plane be- if I’m the one in charge of saving peoples lives? – Stevie

I’ve heard that South Dakota is quite scenic. – Patrick

Hoboken, Windsor, and South Dakota

What is wrong with me? -Stevie
How honest do you want us to be?- David

Why do you hate my movie?
I just sw the trailer
Exactly yet you’ve already deemed it this years John Carter?

Just so you know- an actress is only as happy as her unhappiest audience. – Moira

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Thursday 9th of January 2020

Haha love this! Add one more from Moira:

“Life is but a strand of happy accidents.”

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